Majester (Stewart)
Abdul-Jalil and Anita Terry, both Class of '89, experienced the death of a
parent at different times in their lives and under very different
circumstances. Their personal challenges and private reactions as they put
their lives together display a common courage, resilience and a desire to help
others. Today Abdul-Jalil has completed his second year at Morehouse School of
Medicine, and Terry is in her final semester at Duke Law School.
Although his father has been dead for 17 years, Abdul-Jalil says he'll never
forget that day after Christmas in 1978 that continues to influence his life.
These days he has taken upon himself some of the burdens left behind in the
wake of his father's death while continuing to pursue his life-long dream of
becoming a doctor. Abdul-Jalil is on a year-long hiatus from Morehouse to
attend to family matters. His mother's breast cancer, first diagnosed in 1987,
has returned, a brother died of AIDS in February and another brother has been
diagnosed with the HIV virus. He travels between New York and Atlanta to ensure
his brother and mother are receiving proper medical care.
Abdul-Jalil has also become a surrogate father to some family members. He went
to Denver when he noticed his nephew Corey drifting emotionally and
academically under lax parental guidance. He eventually helped get Corey a
scholarship to the Hyde School in Bath, Maine, Abdul-Jalil's alma mater. He
hopes to get a similar scholarship for Corey's younger sister next year. The
strain, he says, is incredible but manageable. Despite the seemingly daunting
circumstances, he remains committed to becoming a physician and returning to
his old neighborhood in New York City.
Born in Harlem, Abdul-Jalil was the youngest of eight children. On the success
of his father's restaurant business, the family was able to move from their
tenement building to their own home in a safer Bronx neighborhood when he was
5.
Abdul-Jalil was only 11 when his father was murdered. The event sent his life
spinning out of control, he says.
"I didn't deal with my father's death very well," he said. "My mom had to go
back to work, I didn't have any supervision and I just didn't care about things
that much. Ages 11 to 13 were tough times for me."
His mother, Marion Stewart, one of the many role models he's had throughout
the years, knew someone whose child attended the Hyde School. She encouraged
her son to visit, and Abdul-Jalil says he fell in love with the school at first
sight.
He says he knew his options were to stay home and get into more trouble or go
to Hyde. He chose Hyde--a decision that changed his life and perhaps saved
it.
"Hyde is more concerned with personal growth, initiative and motivation," said
Abdul-Jalil. "Hyde helped me get back on track." He says he hopes Hyde helps
get Corey back on track as well.
On advice from a teacher at Hyde, Abdul-Jalil deferred attending Syracuse
University and remained in Bath another year to apply to Colby. He became the
first member of his family to earn a college degree.
Abdul-Jalil attributes his perseverance and personal achievements to his
Islamic faith. He converted to Islam in 1986 and in 1991 changed his name,
which means literally "servant of the one who should be revered."
"Islam keeps me focused. It helped me get through Colby and I am thankful for
that," said Abdul-Jalil, who married Colby classmate Anne Burger '89.
After graduating from Colby with a degree in biology, Abdul-Jalil worked two
years as an Emergency Medical Technician, which provided experience in the
medical field and better prepared him for medical school. In the fall of 1991,
a year after being accepted, he began a five-year program at Morehouse, in
Atlanta.
In the summer of 1993 Abdul-Jalil worked at Harvard Medical School researching
pediatric AIDS testing methods for the Children's Hospital of Boston and the
Dupont (check whether capital P) Corporation. Last summer he worked at a clinic
in Villa Rica, Ga.--the only facility between Atlanta and the Alabama
border--which saw more than 300 patients daily and gave Abdul-Jalil the
opportunity "to do everything from dealing with newborns to geriatrics."
"My dreams haven't all died, they've just been put on hold for a while," said
Abdul-Jalil about the current interruption in his medical school training.
"It's up to me to have faith that what God plans for me is better than what I
plan for myself."
He says he'd like to get his masters in public health in addition to his M.D.,
and then return to the Bronx to give back to the community where he grew up.
"The Bronx really needs good physicians to come back," he said. "When people
make it, they leave, they don't come back. I want to come back."
A few months before Anita Terry was to leave for a Ph.D. program in philosophy
at the University of Connecticut, she learned that her father was dying of
cancer. The Methodist minister turned philosophy and religion professor did not
have long to live. Terry had been working in Colby's Admissions Office since
graduating three years earlier and wanted to take her education a step further.
But she deferred attending Connecticut, not wanting to make any major
commitments while her dad was so ill.
During that time she happened to speak to Vice President for Academic Affairs
and Dean of Faculty Robert McArthur regarding her choice of Ph.D. programs.
"When I talked to Bob he asked me if I'd thought about going to law school,"
said Terry, who says now she may have been opting for philosophy to please her
father. "I thought about [law school] in high school a little, but never at
Colby.
She changed course and plans for law school. Terry missed only four questions
on the LSAT, scoring 179 from a possible 180. She was accepted at several
schools and opted for Duke.
"I liked philosophy," said Terry, whose concentration was in women's studies.
"My dad taught philosophy at a local college [in Iowa], and for me it was
challenging and interesting while an undergrad. But it just didn't feel
right."
Choosing a small school like Duke--with only 180 students in her class--was a
good decision, says Terry. During her first semester--many law students' most
intense and demanding time--her father died. She left school for three weeks.
"If I had gone anywhere else," she explained, "I probably would have had to
drop out of school. But the professors made sure people were taking notes for
me, they sent me my books and people just helped out. It was the best that it
could be."
She says she coped well with her father's death because she had time to tell
him how much she loved him and his death wasn't unexpected. Most important, she
says, she was able to say goodbye and relive many family memories with him in
his final days.
"It's not like you ever stop being sad," said Terry. "There are times that
I'll think about something and want to tell my dad and then say, `Oh, yeah,
he's not around anymore.'"
Terry endured: law school enabled her to concentrate on things other than her
father and her family and his death gave her a greater perspective on life and
living.
"For law students it's very important to get good grades, but I could not have
cared less because of my father's death," she recalled. "In the end that helped
me a lot because I was more relaxed than other students. And now, sometimes I
worry because I don't panic."
As editor-in-chief of the Duke Law Journal, Terry embodies a spirit similar to
that displayed during her Colby days--distinguished by an enthusiasm for
meeting people, singing and the pursuit of knowledge. (The Law Journal editor
at many law schools is the top student in the class; at Duke members of the
journal elect their editor--an equally prominent honor).
After her first year in law school Terry returned to Maine to work in the U.S.
Attorney's office in Bangor. Last summer she split her time between law firms
in Boston and Philadelphia. When she graduates in May she will head to
Jacksonville, Fla., where she will clerk for Judge Gerald Tjoflat, Chief
Justice of the 11th Circuit Federal Court of Appeals. She says she will
consider working as a public defender or as an administrator for a non-profit
group and dreams of returning to Maine to teach at Maine Law School in
Portland.
"I'm not really interested in working in a law firm," Terry said, despite the
lucrative offer she received from a Philadelphia firm. "The money is hard to
turn down. But I have this bleeding-heart liberal desire to help others, which
isn't easy at a big law firm."
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