Colby Magazine - Spring 1999 Barbara Kleinman Lainere '55: Art from the Heart
Barbara Kleinman Lainere '55 At 65, Barbara Kleinman Lainere '55 has the heart of a 30-year-old man. A professional artist in Beechhurst, N.Y., Lainere says she isn't one of the high achievers usually chronicled in Lifestyles, the Toronto-based magazine that recently told the story of her heart--and her heart transplant. But, she says, "I did have so many miracles."
    In January 1993, Lainere was in intensive care at Massachusetts General Hospital in Boston. With only a week or two to live, she was fourth on the list of heart recipients in New England. When a young man's heart became available after a traffic accident, the medical condition of two recipients moved her up on the list, and a blizzard kept a helicopter from flying to another. At 2 a.m on Superbowl Sunday she was awakened for surgery.
    "I said, `God, I'm in your hands. I don't want to die, but if I have to, I'm ready.' Then I remember this incredible feeling of peace. Whatever was going to be was going to be all right," Lainere said.
    It wasn't all right. During the operation her lungs kept filling with fluid. The heart wasn't taking . . . and didn't for 12 hours. Three months later Lainere was back in the hospital because the anti-rejection medications weren't working. She lost hair, she lost weight; she says she felt like a zombie. Just when the doctors told her they were looking for another heart for her--the only time she ever gave up, Lainere says--an experimental treatment, "the last miracle," took all the blood out of her body, purified first the white and then the red blood cells, then pumped the blood back.
     Despite sensitive skin and other side effects of so many potent drugs, Lainere continues working. In the early 1960s, knowing she could never afford to own the art she loved, she began painting in the style of the Impressionists. "I paint because I am creating something beautiful," she said. "I put my hands where my heart is." Today a gallery in Roslyn, Long Island, exhibits her paintings, and many are in private collections and museums, including one at Colby.
    Lainere, a Swampscott, Mass., native, says that even as a child at camp in Maine she experienced heart palpitations and occasional pain but told no one. At Colby she remembers struggling up hills. She couldn't talk--because she was out of breath and because she was ashamed. "I didn't stop to think I had anything wrong. I just thought I wasn't as good or as capable as everybody else," she said. She was in her early 30s before tests found she had a rare heart ailment.
    "I felt like I was a phony all my life," Lainere said. "Now I feel like an honest person, with myself and everybody else. I live a productive life."
    Give yourself the top medical team, she advised six years after the heart transplant--and be a positive thinker. "It isn't what happens to a person in life," she observed, "it's how you handle what happens." Then she headed off to Florida, where her son, David, owner of a Wall Street trading firm, and his wife are about to make her a grandmother.

Alumni at Large